So one of the things I noticed this past week is how hyper everyone is about pacifiers and bottles. We had relatives yanking the paci out of the babeola's mouth while commenting on its evilness.
The babeola took it in stride, but I found it to be rude. Kind of like someone yanking a chocolate bar out of your mouth. Way to lord adult authority over a small, pre-verbal child, people. Bully much?
Contrary to what my judgmental extended family may believe, we do limit the paci time at home. We have a routine where she sets it on the bookcase next to her crib before we leave her room. We do the same thing with the lovey as I am terrified of losing the thing and try to keep it safe in the crib at home.
However, while traveling I relaxed the rules and let the babeola have the paci and her lovey as much as she wanted. I figured it was the least we could do after strapping her into a car seat for 12+ hours.
I did not anticipate how anti-pacifier people were though. I noted downright embarrassment and mortification from other moms in the family when their little ones were caught with a binky in their mouths. And the commentary over the babeola's binky habit, made my eyes roll into the back of my head.
It was weird, as if kids are in danger of growing so dependent they might go to their grave with a pacifier in their mouths. I am not the kind of parent who worries about that stuff. I sucked my thumb until I was 12, but I stopped and have a great smile without braces so nyah-nyah. My husband recalls getting daily bottles of hot chocolate through the age of 6, yet, at 37, doesn't require his beer bottles to come with a nipple on top.
Pacifiers and bottles, to me, are self-limiting attachments that will be outgrown when a child is ready to leave them behind. I don't need to do anything special other than honor my child's need for comfort and I am not embarrassed by it either.
People need to chill.
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4 comments:
I can't tell you how much I agree with this post. Well said and I am really sorry you and the babiola had to deal with that.
Hubby and I get criticized too as our 5 yr old sucks his thumb sometimes. His grandparents are disgusted and embarassed by it but i've learned that its far more about them and their personal problems than it is a reflection on my son or my parenting.
When kids leave their comforts behind as the grow they are well adjusted and feel safe.
Good for you for speaking up for your child.
*cheers*
Mrs.F.
Doug here. Only way I can leave a comment is as Malathion . . . pout ;)
Jake broke his own binkie (isn't that what they're called?) habit after something like three months. We never had to fuss with him over it. No, our big deal with him was eating at restaurants. He'd throw flaming fits . . . until we realized that he was pissed that we were eating different food from him!
People just need to mind their own business and not get so worked up over little stuff like this! ARGH! Just leave the kid alone ... and you're the mom -- not them.
To each their own. We usually cut them off at age 2 but that is us. I don't care what other people do. To each their own :-)
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